Two weeks, three days and 11 hours. That’s how long I’ve been missing you so far, Mum. I knew you were going to be leaving us, and I thought I was prepared. But I wasn’t. I want to call you up and tell you how things went after you died, and then I remember that I can’t. I’m fairly sure you don’t get internet access where you are in Heaven, but just in case you can, this blog post is for you.
Your funeral was amazing, Mum. You would have been so proud of all of us eight kids, we all stood together and supported each other. It was a good thing you had so many of us, sharing the pain lightened the load.
We arranged 70 coloured helium balloons, one for each of your years, and we let them go as your coffin was lowered. I wish I had thought to tell you a couple of weeks ago that I was planning on doing that. You would have loved the colours.
Afterwards there were plenty of laughs. Not even a funeral could dampen our sense of fun with each other. You would have loved to have this photo of all of us, this doesn’t happen often enough. Seems wrong to have a family photo without you in it though. I guess I’ll just have to get used to it.
Now everyone has gone back home. Life is getting back to normal. But still I miss you. I’m holding onto those verses that talk about there being a time for everything, a time to laugh and a time to cry. I just figure this is the time to cry and that happiness shouldn’t be too far down the track again.
Oh, and one more thing. I have your old bible. I know it was your most treasured possession. It’s all loved and worn, written in, underlined and cried on. I love it. Thank you.
So we’re all moving on, I guess, just as you’d want us to. I still wish that things were so different and that you were still here, but that doesn’t seem to help anything.
So one final time, as I used to say when I would tuck you in at night “Love you much and mucher, Goodnight Ma”.
XXX
Dear Jessica.
I too have lost my mother. I too have wanted to phone her & then recalled I cannot. But most importantly, I too have had a mum who loves and is loved by our Lord Jesus Christ.
May the Lord be your comforter & bring you into remembrance of the things your dear mum shared with you that glorified the Lord.
Although we do not know each other, I am your sister in the Lord.
Love, hugs & God bless,
Sally-May
BEAUTIFUL. x
Oh, Jess. This is beautiful. I’m sure your Mum is looking down and so pleased with all of you. I’m sure she is the proudest Mum up in Heaven.
Jessica Jones you are one cool chick and a total inspiration. Our hearts are with you xx
Hi sister, you have a wonderful gift of sharing. I love you as always. I too miss her terribly. I guess thats because we all had special relationships with her.
I think mum would have wanted me to take you under my wing and I now will stand in the gap as your mum. I know it wont come close to being her but know that I love you more than words..
Your oldest sis
You write so beautifully and this is no exception. Your Mama would have been so proud indeed. She WAS so proud. Thinking of you and sending loves and hugs xoxo
I’m welling, one blink away from a tear. I don’t know what else to say really because my heart is crap with words… but you, your family and your Mum… All sooo beautiful!!!
4months 13 days 8 hours and I still want to tell my mum about thing I have seen in my day, a news item that might interest her,an idea I have had… Jessica I am so sorry you have lost your mum, she looks like a lovely lady! How precious it is to know our lovely mothers are safe with their Lord, with no more pain or sorrow. I remember Sally-May’s lovely mother too, she was a wonderful Christian lady, and I was so sorry to hear that she had been ill and gone to heaven, I really miss seeing her: we used to bump into one another in odd places 🙂 Love and hugs to you both, my sisters in Christ!
Just beautiful Jess, I know it’s a time to cry but lets hope as time goes on the load gets lighter. Your a talent and a big blessing to me. I miss you much sissy. Big kiss for my widdle sis 🙂 xxxxxxxxx
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss Jessica. This was a very moving post – beautifully written.
beautifull Jess,I miss her so much too,I find myself going into her room trying to connect with her somehow but know she’s gone.Sniff
I dont even know you but this made me shed more than a few tears! Beautiful! is all I can say x
Oh Jess, I’ve just read this post and it’s a good job I don’t mind crying in public! I’m so sorry to hear your Mum passed. I think she would be very proud of your post. What a beautiful collection of words and images. Thank you for sharing! Kx